C.I.O. is the most famous sleep training technique, and the most controversial — although, despite its daunting name, it is safe and effective. In its simplest form, unmodified extinction, you place your infant down at bedtime, drowsy but awake, and then leave the room, without returning to check on or soothe your baby. This method will work quickly, but often produces prolonged periods of crying for a few nights, which can be difficult for parents to tolerate.
Typically, formula-fed infants who are growing well no longer need to feed at night by 6 months. Breastfed infants may continue a little bit longer, but typically no longer feed at night by 9 months. If your baby has been falling asleep independently at bedtime for a month but still waking to feed, you may want to consider weaning at night. Be aware that if you are breastfeeding, this may lead to a reduction in milk supply.
Sleep training advocates in this category encourage a more gradual approach – soothing the baby to sleep and offering comfort right away when the child cries. Pediatrician William Sears, author of The Baby Sleep Book, is a leading proponent. Parent educator Elizabeth Pantley outlines a step-by-step no tears approach in her book The No-Cry Sleep Solution.
Singing a few lullabies to set the mood, put her down while she’s settled, she’ll play with her hands and feet for about 10-15 minutes, she starts fussing so I give her a chance to settle (but never does), then it turns into full blown crying. I try to lull, shush, pick up and rock but it doesn’t help. It seems like she doesn’t want to be held nor put down. After crying so much that she turns blue and me rocking the life out of myself she falls asleep. I can’t put her down until she is in deep sleep otherwise she will wake.
"The more practice your baby gets putting himself to sleep, the quicker the process works. He will fall asleep on his own, and you will get the sleep you need...Don't wait too long, though. The earlier, the better. Remember, once your baby gets older – that is, at least 5 or 6 months – the process of getting your child on a sleep schedule and to sleep through the night gets more difficult."
As we previously mentioned, introducing healthy sleep habits and routines as early as possible will help significantly during sleep training. If you haven’t already, try to establish a bedtime routine before you start sleep training baby — this will encourage healthy baby sleep patterns. This should be a series of soothing activities that help to calm your baby and prepare them for sleep - things like swaddling, bathing, and rocking usually work well, but every family’s routine will look different.
12 baby-sleep tips for exhausted new parents Before you even think about “training” your baby to fall asleep on their own, make sure you’re following a regular schedule and putting them to bed at a consistent time each night (hint: early is usually better, typically around 7 or 8 p.m.). Starting at about two months old, it’s a good idea to try to put them down drowsy but awake whenever you can, just to get them (and you) used to it, even if they fuss a bit. Make sure that they’ve been awake for an appropriate amount of time before bed (an over- or under-tired baby will have trouble falling asleep), and establish a calming and consistent bedtime routine, like a feed, bath or massage followed by pyjamas and stories or songs. Some experts recommend feeding at the beginning of the routine to avoid having the baby associate the feeding with falling asleep. Ideally, your baby won’t have started to nod off at any point during your bedtime routine. “You really want to make sure your baby is primed for sleep,” says Pamela Mitelman, a psychologist in Montreal who specializes in infant and child sleep. Be conscious, too, of filling their daytime awake periods with enough activity and stimulation, says Garden. “Kids need to be moving in all sorts of ways when they are awake, not just sitting in a bouncy chair,” she says.